Thank You

I just wanted to take a minute to say thanks.  You people are awesome.

I've really been on a bit of an emotional roller coaster for a little while.  There have been hopeful highs and disappointing lows.  The stress has taken its toll physically, and the physical has stressed me out.  It's a vicious cycle, and I've been doing my best to stay positive through it all (or at least to return to positivity quickly).

In the midst of it all, though, I have gotten so many positive words from some of you, and they have really helped to pick me up when my spirits were low.  I am grateful for the feedback, the encouragement, and the support. 

Overall, I am grateful for you.

** If you like what you read, tell a friend!  Actually, tell me too - post a comment below!!  If you don't ... well ... I'm all for honesty, but please be gentle!

Half-Tox Report

I can be my own worst enemy.

I told you I'd keep you posted about my next step, but I haven't really had anything to say.  I'm now halfway through my 10-day detox, and honestly, I feel ... fine.  I haven't had the headaches, nausea & weakness that they say is expected during the most food-restrictive days (well, I get them already, but they didn't get any worse lol).  I haven't really been hungry, as I can still eat food (very specifically limited food, but it's not like I'm fasting).  Surprisingly, it hasn't really been hard.  I've gone out to eat with friends, and chosen the organic split pea soup and fruit while they had pasta and cookies.  And I'm drinking tea, which is nowhere near as satisfying as coffee, but it still hits the spot.

So the weird thing is that while this is actually a good thing, in a funk I found a way to make it negative.  Though I'm sticking to this thing 100%, I actually started thinking that since I wasn't feeling as bad as they say I might along the way, I probably wouldn't feel as good as they say I should after I'm done.  So while some people may have difficulty sticking with a program like this when it gets too tough, I actually thought about quitting because it wasn't tough enough.

Next Step

Ok, so as you can tell from a few of my recent posts, I've been dealing with a lot lately, both physically & mentally.  I'm doing the best I can to focus on the positive (notice I didn't say trying), and taking steps as needed so that I'm still the one in control of my life.  Today started a new step, and though I know it may be tough, I'm really excited about it.

Nerd? Dork? Geek? YES!

I'm a geek.  I admit it.  I'm also a nerd and a dork.  Yes, those are three separate and distinct qualities, and I am proud to embody each one of them.  Today, though, I am definitely in all my geek glory.

Let's start with the definitions, as I see them:

I'm Back

How I've Been Feeling Lately

(AKA The Scream by Edvard Munch)

Sorry it's been a little while since my last post ... ok, maybe a little more than a little while ... and while technically I did say from the start that I didn't know how often I'd be posting on here, I did not want to go this long without writing.  I have had a few reasons for staying away, but they're just not good enough ... so I'm back.  Please, allow me to explain:

OK to Rest?

Normally, I'm probably what you would call an overachiever.  I don't know how to do something just a little bit. I don't just participate in an event, I join the committee to put the whole thing together (or start up a new event completely).  Through most of my adult life, I've had at least 2 jobs at a time, while doing volunteer work equal to a full time gig.  Add to that little side projects that always come up, social events that need to be planned, and errands that need to be run, and ... well, I just never really knew how to relax.

Family

I believe that family is more about what is in your heart than who shares your bloodline.  DNA (or marriage) only determines your relatives.  Though there may be a great deal of overlap, these are two very different concepts.

For starters, we've all got those relatives that we only ever see at weddings and funerals: aunts, uncles, second cousins three times removed (what exactly does that mean, anyway?  how do you "remove" a cousin?).  I've got nothing against them; it's just that we don't really know them.  It's hard to think of someone as family if you haven't seen her since you wore footie pajamas, you couldn't pick him out of a line-up, or it takes two breaths to explain how you're related to your mother's cousin's half-brother's uncle's sister's stepfather's niece.

Not Funny

Ok, so here's another post that's just going to make you laugh ... but hopefully you'll be laughing with me, not at me ... and maybe you'll even sympathize!  

I just saw this awful commercial for the USPS, and had to share... Ok, I guess in a way it's an awesome commercial, 'cause it's something I could relate to SO much (and many of you probably can, too) ... but it's just so wrong!

I love you, Mom.

A friend of mine lost his mother today.
There are no words.

Autobiography in 5

Ok, I can in no way take credit for this.

This is a piece written by Portia Nelson, originally published in 1977.  I first discovered it many years ago, and have revisited it many times.  It has always given me a sense of peace, strength, and confidence to get through difficult times.  It came to mind when I was writing the piece on quitting, and I thought I'd share it with you.

You never know when it's just what someone needs to hear (or read).  Come back to it anytime you need to ... I know I do.

It's OK to Quit

Or ... go ahead, do it!

We've all been raised to believe that winners never quit, and quitters never win.  On the surface, that sounds nice and positive: it encourages us not to give up on our dreams, not to give in just because things may be difficult.  In many cases, that is the spirit in which it's meant, and it can encourage someone to rise to the challenge.  In a different context, though, it can be just that advice - that fear of being a quitter - that can actually keep us moving along a path that is not right for us, and prevent us from living up to our true potential, and realizing our deepest dreams.

What Adversity?

I am inspired.

I was watching New Year's Rockin' Eve, and thought for a minute they were showing flashbacks to years past.  I'm not talking about when they showed New Kids on the Block or Back Street Boys performing (though that was a bit trippy in and of itself - and I'm not sure if I mean that in a good way).  Seriously, though, I was floored when I saw Dick Clark on screen again.  

2nd-to-Last Bite

Vegetable sushi wrapped in vegetables  © Sooooo exciting!

Ok, we all know that there are some people who eat to live, and there are others who live to eat.  I am definitely in that second group.  

Food is so much more than just physical nourishment.  If done right, it is a pleasurable experience that is best when shared with good friends.  It must be taken in slowly, so that we can thoroughly enjoy it with all of our senses.  The ideal meal includes a variety of colors, textures, flavors, scents.  Each bite must be savored, so we can feel the individual ingredients as they come together in our mouths: the creamy sauce over the crunchy vegetables, the chewy grain with the crispy edge ... the sweet, the salty, the savory ... a perfect chorus of tastes that manages to create harmony while still allowing each individual voice to shine.